14 Apr 2020
I think I’ve reached another point of wanting to make a blog post again. There is a lot I want to get out of my head. I’ll attempt to save you some time by putting it into a list:
Art:
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While I still have fun making fanarts/images manipulations, I am at a point where I want to stop all of it and make more original works instead. While 2019 was an enjoyable year of the PSO memes, I planned to stop making those altogether once 2020 hits. However there are a few more I want to do but it’s more of a parody than a meme.
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In the discussions of fanart, I’ve gotten some folks to approach me for either requests/commissions or typical questions of “hey, do you have an album collection of your fanart?” While this is nice, I’ve declined almost every requests and commissions due to how uncomfortable it is for me to make money off of some Copyrighted and/or IntellectualProperty. If somehow I have a lot financial issues, then I’ll announce it. Also I feel uncomfortable making fanart on something I have limited knowledge about.
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Mind you that it is only around 6 or less that communicated to me about my art. That is nothing compared to a very popular artist that would get these questions everyday. It is just that I wish someone would approach me for some games (GC or BB) or even have a single conversation with me … I feel like I am being used.
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So in a nutshell almost 6 of these would approach me for my art while only 1 would ask me to play with them (this was Schtserv PSOGC, for just a game anyway.)
Loneliness:
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The entire 2018 was pretty sad. I have almost no one to talk to or play with, even when PSOBB Desinty server launched as well. I did join a group/clan in PSO2JP but it I already sense that I don’t fit in at all, they have never touched PSO1 so that should give you a quick idea. I did manage to play with another player but he ended up transferring to a different ship and later quit playing PSO2 altogether. MHW was fun .. alone anyway.
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2019 was somewhat an improvement. Managed to join a guild in PSOBB Ephinea and played some games but I felt I was dragging them down or making them feel annoyed. After the Ephinea anniversary … I haven’t played with them anymore. At least I joined some voice chat here or there …
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Also in 2019 I finally wanted to go back and play some PSOGC. The reason is simple. It wasn’t because of game balance, character data client save, or being able to jump into any server. It is because I wanted to redeem myself. My old character data is illegitimate and thankfully 75 percent of my characters are already corrupted, later it would end up being 100 percent. Feels awesome to start all-over.
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There is a lot I want to share about a certain community I ended up joining for PSOGC but I’ll keep it short. I don’t like it. Gameplay debates are fine. But it comes to legitimacy debates, server debates, version debates, and playstyle debates, it feels as if I have gone back a decade. Please and I mean please, if you know a more mature or rather a group that just likes to play games and not argue 24/7 for PSOGC, let me know. (Actually don’t bother.)
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One detail I hate to announce unless they ask me personally is that I’ve started playing PSO on 2003. I’ve started playing GC and V2PC on Schthack server in that year. I don’t like showing off on how much of an oldfag I am, it’s already cringe enough to see “DC veteran” or “GC vet” on introduction section in certain message boards. I just like to play PSO.
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Either way it doesn’t really help what version of PSO I even play or even touch. It’s really hard to play with randoms. But I need to be more clear on the term “randoms.” Because when I use the term, it suggests I am talking about “bad” or “sub-par” players. I am talking about every kind of player. I used to players leaving without warning since I’ve ever started PSO. While it’s normal to me, it can get tiresome. I understand the whole meme around PW4 quests but it’s really sad to see players unable to stick around. I should mention that it isn’t even me. From a new player to a very fantastic TA player, they all would have a hard time finding a party to join. Just check out their streams on Twitch and you might see what I mean (maybe). So my advice if you are reading this and is still new to PSO series, you better find a friend or group to stick with. It fucking sucks to play alone.
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Also I refuse to be part of any staff group for any PSO server. I already know how much of a shit show Schtserv staff was a decade ago. So to anyone who has a funny idea that I have any power to influence any admin to change something, no. I should be treated as a player/user just like anyone out there.
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2020 … MHW Icebrone … was also fun … alone anyway. I really like to play with others but I hate getting carried. Having a teammate making 60 to 70 percent damage while I do very little? No thanks. I feel satisfied being able to defeat the monster all by myself but unfortunately I felt the journey was very empty. I got to the destination at least by achieving MR150. I should have really opened up more by playing with others and not play solo.
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I tend to question every person that likes to add me as a friend on Discord. “Why?” What makes me so interesting or what gave you any thought of adding me to your friends’ list? Only then to … never have a conversation with me months or even years later? It is a bit puzzling to me. Personally I never like being the type to start the conversation first, because I bet there are a lot more interesting or more fun folks to talk to than me. Or am I wrong?
Maybe there is more for me to add but that is what I want to dump out of my brain.
Stay safe.
20 May 2018
What happened?
Before I start, I want to give my deepest apologies for anyone who wanted to see new webcomics. I can’t promise what will be the set date for a new webcomic but I do suggest following me on Twitter/Mastodon so that way I can keep you updated. Thank you. My current plan is just doing relaxed sketches and illustrations that’ll be shown in Twitter/Mastodon then when I feel ready, webcomics will be next.
It’s sad that it takes poor internet connection due to the router unable to communicate to most of devices to actually … make me do something productive. Such as writing this blog.
Let me get straight to it though.
So the last webcomic I’ve posted is around May 20th, 2017. It’s been a year of no new content.
So what happened?
Well there is no health issues (mental/physical) nor money issues either. It’s time and just pure laziness.
While I enjoyed of being able to push out weekly webcomics, there is something that I hardly ever explain and it’s what I do outside of making art. I have full-time retail job that mostly takes 10 hours off of my day. 1 hour in total of driving, 8 hours of work, 1 hour lunch break. Coming back home, I either get straight to drawing … or play videogames and watch videos. You can guess what I prefer the most. Or … can you?
I’ll never forget the days where I was not only behind a few days to put up my latest webcomics, but had to desperately attempt stay up so late to finish the webcomics. I think the worst moment in my life is when I was in the webcomic adventure is when I had a lack of sleep. It’s one thing for me to have methods to stay awake since I am standing and walking all the time. For me it’s easy, there is no way I’ll fall asleep since I am … standing and walking … I was wrong. Somehow around at the near end of the shift, my head kept wanting to fall down. My entire body was getting weak. And let’s not forget the worst part, driving. I don’t know how I managed to get back home safely, but I was so happy to hit straight to bed. I try my best to not consume too much caffeine but I am at the point where I don’t even know how much I should consume.
The cycle continues to the point where my writing portion of my webcomics is falling behind. There is no way I can just randomly make up script on the spot (there is last minute edits because I tend to re-read line if it’s sounds off.) There needs to be some kind of flow and some humor at least for these webcomics.
It was at that point where I wanted to revisit my favorite online game. It’s funny because as much as I want to avoid playing an addicting game, Monster Hunter … I ended up playing the other kind of game that has the same level of addiction, Phantasy Star Online.
At least I hardly get on Steam in which I was oddly punished for not buying games on Steam for more than a year. Ain’t that something. (Steam/Valve didn’t like my lack of activity, so they prevented me from buying anything from the Marketplace [TF2 hats/CSGO knives etc.] until I’ve purchased at least one game.)
To think I am able to balance my time playing videogames vs. making art. Nope. I was at a point where I felt that I could make a good comeback, it was never happening. So, when I hit hiatus mode I needed make sure I disable my donation via Gumroad since I don’t deserve to receive any form of donation. I am very sorry if you really wanted the sketchbooks that I’ve published, I keep saying that I’ll reupload it but here is the download link finally: https://archive.org/details/@yalyn
Speaking of donations, when the website turned from ugly Wordpress to the minimal/barebones site, I thought about getting rid of the donation button because I felt that it wasn’t worth it. If you are curious if I ever had donations before, I only had two donations … from Gumroad. Both was done out of direct influence. One was done out of telling my brother to share it on facebook and the other was old friend wanting to ask me to share my artwork to him. Respectively, 20 dollars and 25 dollars, with Gumroad taking some of fee, that’ll be $42.25. And, 30 unique downloads … Mind you that this was published around 2015, so these sketchbooks are pretty dated at this point.
I guess it’s also time for me to get into the bigger discussion and that is pretty much “am I worried for having a lack of audience?” While I can’t believe I was able to make weekly webcomics for 1.5 year(s), most of my brain just wanted to keep saying “I am doing it for fun so I don’t need to worry about gaining followership and donations.” But, that other part of my brain really wants to say “Sure would love to gain some attention and maybe get a single donation that doesn’t involve me having to pester someone about it.” It’s sad but true for many content creators out there who are starting out.
I should also note that I am holding myself back. I refuse to make an account for certain social sites such as Facebook and Instagram. I never used a hashtag “ # “ until the start of 2017. I hardly post anything outside of my art such as sharing a funny video that I’ve found or a cool artwork/artist that I saw. You want to know why I hardly share those kind of stuff? It’s because I don’t want to be labeled as a spammy individual. I feared that most of my potential followers would dislike it if I kept spamming them with funny vids, repeat news, dated information, and other things I may be unaware of. It’s understandable that I should be myself and don’t let others control me. I mean I can at least promise that I don’t talk about memes. I’ll talk about that to others or in private but not to my audience.
I think the bigger problem is that I just … don’t post anything. So after waiting for 7-8 days, I post a new webcomic … then repeat. There is obviously a problem here. My potential audience could already be seeking for other kind of content rather waiting for mine. And what I’ve learned from YouTube (yes, I know) and Facebook, it’s all about grabbing attention. That’s not to say I should do daily sketches, even though I find that enjoyable but I should try something new at least.
Another thing I am worried about is posting my webcomics in a webcomics platform. There is no need for me to do that because I already have my very own website. Having my works sitting next to other people’s works would make the audience want to look past my works rather than wanting to actively follow it.
“If you can’t win, join them.” Just because I dislike these sites doesn’t mean I won’t register an account. You might see me start getting into bigger sites and start posting there (yes that means Facebook too.) As of list of sites that I post it is the usual: GooglePlus (it’s dead but not for the open-source communities?), Tumblr, Twitter, and DeviantArt. Yes it can be somewhat time consuming to post to multiple social sites, but maybe I’ll find a way to make it easier. And also … learn to hashtag properly. Also I’ve recently joined Mastodon which is really pleasant site.
Speaking of social, once I am officially back to making more webcomics, I’ll continue with the no donation button as usual and just ask anyone out there just to share my work. That’s really it. As much as I love to quit my retail job and make art forever, I need to make a flip on myself and prove if I can keep making more and more art. Also no Patreon, I guess that’s obvious. I might setup Librepay but I won’t link it publicly, if the time comes, I’ll share it publicly.
It’s different world when it comes to someone who makes content for free. Price or not, I want to make it worthwhile even though someone would only read it for less than minute. I have destroyed many people’s trust. I can imagine followers wanted to see new content from me and I have failed.
I’ll say it again, I am very sorry. I hope I can do better than the previous years.
Right now for this month I’ve been listening to certain art-related audiobooks and preparing to make a move to another state. In the end of May, I’ll be moving.
20 Dec 2016
It’s no joke. This has been planned for more than a year, because, it was bothering me for more than several years ever since I started this webcomic.
Problem:
Yalyn is the name of the author for GreySky.
Yalyn is the name of the protagonist for GreySky.
That’s the problem.
While it might be obvious, (for some I believe,) Yalyn isn’t really my name, it’s a nickname I started using ever since I entered into the whole Internet sort-of-things. The same is like-wise for the protagonist of GreySky, the guy with the spikey black hair. Yalyn isn’t his real name either.
Solution:
I liked the whole 3-letter system I went for my characters so I thought it’s time to have a permanent change on both Yalyn and Sayara. Now all the major characters have 3 letter names.
Origins:
Yalyn is a name I made up when I was creating my very first character for Phantasy Star Online. I wanted to create an original name rather than seeing the 100th Sonic character name or even Sephiroth for the millionth time. While my previous username I go by is Number 2 (SonicNo2 even further back) in PSO forums … the rest of the websites out there? I just go as Yalyn. It sort of grew on me. It’s kind of normal to take a persona of character that you’ve created. But the thing is that I now have to separate the character and me because I am no longer role playing that character, I am a storyteller (narrator of the character’s action.) In tabletop gaming terms, I am the Game Master, not the Player Character.
As for the protagonist. The character do have a reason why he prefer the 5 letter name rather than the short one. It’s all because of some childhood hero he liked. He liked it enough that he wanted to take that as his new nickname only then that later, Kel pushed him to switch back to his earlier nickname.
In the end:
To end this, I don’t mind if people call me Yalyn instead of Yabo. It’s just time for me to end this before things get complicated/confusing.
Thanks for reading. I hope to continue making more webcomics.
04 Dec 2016
While many things are being pushed back (because of real-life stuff) I thought I might as well make this post. I hope that you will also understand bit better on what kind of webcomics I make.
- Rule No.1: No internet memes, no inside jokes, do not create content that only 1 out of 100 can understand.
- Rule No.2: Do not create anything that is related to recent event(s).
For the first rule, while it can be enjoyable to feature something that your group of friends found on the internet, you have to step back and think. Internet memes can weaken your work if most of your audience are not familiar with most or any sort of internet meme they come across.
Back in the old days I’ve created old PSO (Phantasy Star Online) fan comics (done in strip style) and they are designed for only the most hardcore PSO players to understand the joke. Even experienced players will have a long time understanding what is going on. Some strips where even more specific to the point that only my friend and I got the laugh out of it. To the audience, it’s a mystery.
It’s not fun for a confused reader to read something they don’t get only then to research on several websites just to understand the joke.
Not to mention they can also be dated and speaking of that, rule number two. The second rule is more about something that happens around us.
Politics are quick example but I am a lot better with videogames, but I am not going into details though. Let’s say there is videogaming convention and there is new videogame system/software. It’s easy to pick out the details and make something out of it. It’s even more easy if the event went disastrous.
Even more, let’s have some triple-A videogame be released, only then to learn it ended up being a buggy mess. There’s an opportunity.
Also pointing out things that is out of logic due to the fact of either for fictional reasons or poor programming.
Could even go so far to shout out to the developers or publishers of how their decision(s) is either great or not so great.
While these are great and I could have enjoyment out of making these, it can be dated very quickly. Imagine reading some old webcomics that poked fun at several things that I have talked about. While it’s great for historical purposes, the work no longer has that impact.
To end this off, I want to emphasize that these are my personal rules. You do not need to follow them at all. This is just to give an idea of what kind of webcomics I like to make. Who knows if I’ll end up breaking these rules.
Maybe someday I’ll have a third rule to add this.
06 Nov 2016
So at first I wanted to make an hour long video of me talking while having PSO as my background footage but video editor didn’t want to cooperate.
So instead I’ll just write them down here in a short version instead.
The web side
- You might noticed how minimal/barebones the main site is and it is intentional. The reason why, is that if my website is not mobile friendly for Google, my site is most likely not to appear if anyone searches my site from their portable device (if they are searching on Google of course.)
- Because of that I had to find something to get out of Wordpress because the navigation buttons are too small and other things that I also do not like about Wordpress. So I found a quick solution called Grawlix and after wasting 30-40 hours I could not get it to work. I did get help from both the creators of the CMS and the host services. No luck. So I end up going back to the minimal/barebones Poor Man’s Comic Publisher which is created by Triskaideka.
- While trying to get into Grawlix I also switch hosts in hopes of getting Grawlix to work. I ended up switching from A Small Orange to HostGator. Might as well have unlimited bandwidth (unmetered.)
The Grey universe
- I am trying to make more evil characters for the GreySky series. So far I have a couple in concept.
- I have V the punk leader, Des the rejected spy, Sis the sharpshooter/sniper, Zoe the goth magic-user.
- The ones that doesn’t have a name yet is the cyborg who uses an assault rifle and an odd suitcase, talented young dark-skin boy is has a knack for fixing things.
- The names are subject to change by the way.
- I am very happy about how I manage to put together the new house that the characters are moving to. I may make a BTS (behind the scenes) of how the house is laid out.
- Character list is still within planning. I don’t know if a wiki is needed yet.
Personal things/making art stuff
- Around March 2016 I started releasing webcomics weekly instead of rarely posting anything.
- I’ll admit things are getting a bit difficult in terms of getting the webcomics out. I think there is only two times that I have past the actual day the new webcomic should be out but instead it ended up being several hours late. I apologize for that.
- I have intentionally avoid buying the new MonsterHunter game because the pervious MonsterHunter game I’ve played, I wasted more than 500+ hours. There is a lot I could of done with those collected amount of hours. It is also the reason why I haven’t made any new webcomics for 1.5 years. That had changed when I started pushing out webcomics weekly on March 2016. I used to be part of a group that plays MonsterHunter and I know they would taunt me to the point where they would discourage me from drawing and just play with them instead. That is no longer a problem now.
- Games I still have interest, planning to play them, or already playing them:
- Any PSO games
- Pokemon Sun and Moon
- Pokemon romhacks
- Black Desert Online
- Yet despite of all that I’ve uninstalled Steam. The reason is that not only, I want to “try” to stray away from games, but I want to stop myself from buying games only then I do not even play them. Save myself the money (and time.)
Last major news
- Have load of things I want to write on the blog, reviewing laptops, reviewing books, tutorials, and more.
- I wanted to open up a Patreon once my 50th webcomic is out but I deiced that I do not want to because of two points. 1.) I have nothing written down for it. Not even a draft. 2.) I don’t think I deserve it yet.
I want to thank everyone who read my webcomcics. Whenever late or not, thank you.